How to be a heartbreaker

atouchof-blackandwhite:

Why do I feel like Yahoo’s Professor Umbridge and they’re taking over and shit’s about to go down.

Post 26 minutes ago

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quentintarantinos:

Joaquin Phoenix in Walk the Line, 2005

Post 27 minutes ago

“I never wanted this for you. I work my whole life—I don’t apologize—to take care of my family, and I refused to be a fool, dancing on the string held by all those bigshots. I don’t apologize—that’s my life—but I thought that, that when it was your time, that you would be the one to hold the string. Senator Corleone; Governor Corleone…Well, this wasn’t enough time, Michael. It wasn’t enough time.

Post 27 minutes ago

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absconds:

if u have a crush on me please stand up

(via the--left--phalange)

Post 5 hours ago

geometricdeathtrap:

metallikato:

generallegendary:

metallikato:

jewelstaites:

how to give a good handjob

bop it

pull it

twist it

harder

better

faster

stronger

You pull your left hand in
You pull your left hand out
You pull your left hand in
And you shake it all about!

Cha cha real smooth

none of you ever touch a penis

(via the--left--phalange)

Post 5 hours ago

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krazininjakittyfordeanwinchester:

Have you ever been in such an antisocial mood that when people try to talk to you, you get frustrated?

(via the--left--phalange)

Post 5 hours ago

getfitstayyfit:

1/4 cup of rolled oats, 1 med. banana, 1 tbsp of flax seeds, 1 tbsp of pb2, 1 tbsp of honey, 1 cup of almond milk.

Post 5 hours ago

thugkitchen:

You can’t have a legit BBQ without a badass potato salad. But don’t be a dick and buy that nasty shit at the store. Make this instead; it is cheap as fuck and super easy. You can even leave it in the sun for a minute and it won’t get all gross like that potatomayo nonsense they try to pass off as a salad. People don’t deserve that basic, bland shit.

FRESH HERB POTATO SALAD

1 1/2 pounds of small red or Yukon gold potatoes

1 teaspoon Dijon mustard

3 tablespoons white wine vinegar

2 tablespoons lemon juice (about 1 lemons)

¼ cup extra virgin olive oil

2 cloves of garlic

1/3 cup shredded carrot (I used 1 normal-sized carrot. Don’t try to grate baby carrots; you will fuck your hand up)

¼ cup of chopped chives (you can use green onions to save some cash)

¼ cup chopped dill

salt and pepper

Cut your potatoes in half or until they are in pieces that you can actually put in your mouth. Nobody should need a knife to eat potato salad, that shit is fucked. Boil some water in a medium pot, add a pinch of salt, and the potatoes. Boil them until you can easily stab a fork through one, like 10-15 minutes depending on the size of your potatoes. If you cook them too long they start falling apart and your salad will be a fucking mess. Set a timer if your ass is easily distracted.

While the potatoes cook, cut up the garlic into a bunch of tiny pieces. Mix together the mustard, vinegar, lemon juice, oil, and garlic in a small glass. Drain the potatoes and put them in a large bowl. Add the dressing and toss it all together. Add the carrots, herbs, and a little salt and pepper and mix them in. Let the salad sit in the fridge for at least 30 minutes so that the potatoes can soak in all the flavor. If it looks dry after that then add a little more vinegar and olive oil and stir that bitch. Make this shit the day before you go somewhere and keep it in the fridge. Nobody will know the fucking difference.

Serves 4 as a side

Post 5 hours ago

an epic trilogy

(via the--left--phalange)

Post 5 hours ago

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